Recently I realised how much I have tried to over-control my life.
I have tried to engineer so much to give me certainty of outcome.
Recently I was surfing in Raglan at Manu Bay. There are two ways to get in the water; across some rocks and into the white water, or off a rock called ‘Jump Rock’ that gives you a clear run out the back.
I spoke to a local who reckoned that given that the waves were a bit unpredictable, as we had just come out of a storm, that across the rocks and through the white water was the best way.
In my ultimate wisdom I, however, decided to go off Jump Rock.
To get to Jump Rock you have to travel across a bunch of other rocks in between sets (of waves). I waited for the set to go through, and when it had passed, I embarked across the rocks.
However, a rogue wave came through between the sets and knocked me off the rocks. I fell into the rocks, cutting my head and ripping up my legs and hands.
After this wave came through, I had no choice but to scramble over the rest of the rocks and into the water because if I was still in the rocks when the set hit, I’d be in big trouble.
After I’d been stitched and bandaged up, I took some time to reflect.
I realised that, like in life, my thought that I could control this situation was an illusion. I had no control; the waves came as they came and if I was in the way when they did, I was going with them.
Knowing that, perhaps rather than controlling life we’re better to respect the fact that we aren’t in control and to just show up as best we can in every moment.